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畢業典禮

你認為畢業典禮應該是個溫馨感人、活潑熱鬧、或是嚴肅傷感的場景?請寫一篇英文作文說明你對畢業典禮的看法,第一段寫出畢業典禮對你而言意義是什麼,第二段說明要如何安排或進行活動才能呈現出這個意義。

載入中…

這一題的頂標範文與寫作技巧建議先自己寫完、送出批改,再打開對照。打開看範文 ▾
頂標範文同一題的示範寫法,值得學起來

頂標範文與技術分析

這是同一題的頂標等級範文,標色的地方是值得學起來的進階文法句型或用字。

A graduation ceremony, in my view, should be a warm and heartfelt occasion — one that honors not only academic achievement but also the bonds formed along the way. For me, graduation is less about the diplomas handed out on stage and more about pausing to appreciate three years of shared laughter, late-night studying, and quiet encouragement from teachers who believed in us even when we doubted ourselves. It is a threshold moment: we stand between the familiar world of high school and an open, uncertain future, and that bittersweet mixture of gratitude and anticipation is precisely what makes the day so meaningful. To capture this spirit, the ceremony should be designed around human connection rather than rigid formality. Rather than filling the program with lengthy official speeches, I would invite two or three students to share brief, honest stories — a funny classroom memory, a teacher's advice that changed their thinking, a friendship that pulled them through a difficult time. Should time allow, a short video montage of candid photos taken throughout the three years would move the audience far more than any polished presentation could. Finally, instead of a generic class song, students could choose an original piece performed live by their own classmates, turning the closing moment into something created by — and truly belonging to — the graduating class itself. With these touches, a graduation ceremony becomes not just a formal rite of passage, but a genuine celebration of the people and memories that shaped who we are.

技巧說明(6)

破折號補充說明A graduation ceremony, in my view, should be a warm and heartfelt occasion — one that honors not only academic achievement but also the bonds formed along the way.

破折號(em dash)後接「one that…」,是英文中常見的「補充定義」句構,讓主題句在說出核心觀點後立刻展開細節,一氣呵成。這個結構比另起一句更緊湊有力。學生可以套用此模板:「A + 名詞 + — one that + 關係子句」,在說明類題型的首句就抓住閱卷老師的目光。

比較輕重的對比句構(less about… and more about…)graduation is less about the diplomas handed out on stage and more about pausing to appreciate three years of shared laughter

「less about A and more about B」是一個精準表達「重心轉移」的進階句型,比直接說「graduation is not only A but also B」更有層次感,也更能體現批判性思考。建議學生在「表達個人觀點」類作文中活用此句型,例如:「Success is less about talent and more about persistence.」

名詞片語的排比(三項平行)three years of shared laughter, late-night studying, and quiet encouragement from teachers who believed in us even when we doubted ourselves

三個平行名詞片語(shared laughter / late-night studying / quiet encouragement)構成排比,節奏感強、畫面感豐富。注意每個項目都有修飾語(shared、late-night、quiet),讓描述更立體。學生可學習「用三個帶形容詞的名詞片語」來取代空洞的列舉。

同位語補充句(threshold moment 的隱喻)It is a threshold moment: we stand between the familiar world of high school and an open, uncertain future

冒號(colon)後接具體說明,是英文寫作中「先給概念、後給畫面」的高效結構。此處「threshold moment(門檻時刻)」是一個充滿意象的隱喻,比單調地說「important moment」高明許多。學生可練習用「It is a +隱喻名詞:具體說明」來提升文章的文學性。

假設語氣(Should + 主詞 + V)Should time allow, a short video montage of candid photos taken throughout the three years would move the audience far more than any polished presentation could.

「Should + 主詞 + 原形動詞」是「If + 主詞 + should + V」的倒裝形式,屬於正式且進階的假設語氣寫法,能立刻提升文章的語法層次。此句同時搭配「far more than…could」做比較,效果更強烈。學生只要掌握這個倒裝句型,在考試中便能展現超越一般考生的文法能力。

分詞片語作後置修飾(turning…)students could choose an original piece performed live by their own classmates, turning the closing moment into something created by — and truly belonging to — the graduating class itself.

句尾的「turning the closing moment into…」是分詞構句,表示「結果」或「附帶情況」,讓句子在不增加從句的情況下繼續延伸意義,讀起來流暢且不累贅。破折號之間的插入語「— and truly belonging to —」更是一個展示細膩情感的精妙補充。學生可用「V-ing…」的分詞構句為自己的結尾句增添力道。

範文由 WriteUp 依學測評分規準產生,供練習參考,不是大考中心公布的佳作。

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