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看圖寫作基礎歷屆真題・98學測120~250 字

房屋倒塌

請根據下方圖片的場景,描述整個事件發生的前因後果。文章請分兩段,第一段說明之前發生了什麼事情,並根據圖片內容描述現在的狀況;第二段請合理說明接下來可能會發生什麼事,或者未來該做些什麼。

一間已經傾倒的房子,屋頂倒塌,牆壁也倒塌,有一個婦人帶著斗笠,揹著竹簍經過,看著房子,像是地震過過後也像是戰後的景象。

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這一題的頂標範文與寫作技巧建議先自己寫完、送出批改,再打開對照。打開看範文 ▾
頂標範文同一題的示範寫法,值得學起來

頂標範文與技術分析

這是同一題的頂標等級範文,標色的地方是值得學起來的進階文法句型或用字。

Not long ago, a powerful earthquake struck this quiet village without any warning. Within seconds, the roof of this old house caved in, and its brick walls crumbled into heaps of broken tiles and shattered beams. Had the residents not fled in time, they might have been buried under the debris. Now, as the photo shows, nothing remains but a skeleton of scattered wood and rubble. A woman wearing a straw hat, with a bamboo basket on her back, walks slowly past the ruins, staring at what used to be someone's home. Her quiet gaze seems to say more than words ever could, reflecting the shock and sorrow shared by everyone who survived the disaster. In the days to come, rescue teams should hurry to search the wreckage in case anyone is still trapped inside. Only by clearing the debris quickly can further accidents, such as collapsing walls, be prevented. Meanwhile, the government ought to provide shelters and supplies so that displaced families do not have to sleep in the cold. In the long run, stricter building codes must be enforced, for it is only through better preparation that such heartbreaking scenes can be kept from repeating themselves.

技巧說明(5)

過去完成式的省略假設語氣(倒裝句)Had the residents not fled in time, they might have been buried under the debris.

這是「與過去事實相反」的假設語氣(third conditional),完整寫法應為 If the residents had not fled in time, they might have been buried under the debris. 但在正式書面英文中,可以把 if 省略,並將 had 提到主詞前面形成倒裝,寫成 Had the residents not fled...,這種倒裝假設句在學測作文中屬於高階句型,能明顯展現文法掌握度,比單純寫 'If they didn't escape, they would die' 更精確且更有層次。學生在描述『差一點發生的災難』或『慶幸沒發生的壞結果』時都可以套用,例如:Had I not studied hard, I would have failed the exam.

分詞構句A woman wearing a straw hat, with a bamboo basket on her back, walks slowly past the ruins

這裡用現在分詞 wearing 修飾主詞 a woman,等同於關係子句 who is wearing a straw hat,但省略了關代與be動詞,使句子更精簡流暢,是英文寫作中常見的『以分詞片語補充說明名詞』的技巧。比起寫成 A woman who wears a straw hat and who has a bamboo basket on her back walks..., 分詞構句的版本更簡潔、閱讀起來更像英文母語者的寫法,也能避免重複使用關代子句顯得冗贅。學生在描述圖片中人物的穿著、攜帶物品時都可以套用此句型,例如:A man carrying a heavy suitcase hurried through the station。

Only by + Ving 倒裝句Only by clearing the debris quickly can further accidents, such as collapsing walls, be prevented.

當句首出現具有否定或限定意味的副詞片語(如 only, never, rarely, not until 等)時,後面的主要子句必須採用『助動詞提前』的倒裝語序,這裡 Only by clearing the debris quickly 放在句首,後面的主詞 further accidents 與助動詞 can 必須倒裝為 can further accidents be prevented。這種句型在英文寫作中屬於加分句型,能展現對倒裝規則的精準掌握,比平鋪直敘的 We can prevent further accidents only by clearing the debris quickly 更具文采與正式感。學生在寫『唯有做某事才能達成某個結果』的建議段落時都可以套用,例如:Only by working together can we solve this problem。

so that 目的子句the government ought to provide shelters and supplies so that displaced families do not have to sleep in the cold

so that 引導的子句用來說明『前面動作的目的或結果』,文法上 so that 後面接完整子句(主詞+動詞),常搭配 can/could/will/would 或一般現在式動詞來表達目的。這個句型比單純用 to V 不定詞(to help displaced families)更能清楚交代『為了達成什麼效果』,句意更完整、邏輯更清楚,也顯示出寫作者能靈活運用不同的連接手法而非一直重複 to V。學生在提出建議、解決方案時都可以套用,例如:We should recycle more so that our planet can stay healthy。

it is only through… that… 強調句it is only through better preparation that such heartbreaking scenes can be kept from repeating themselves

這是 It is...that... 的強調句型,用來強調句子中的某個重要元素,這裡強調的是 through better preparation(唯有透過更好的準備)。強調句的公式是 It is + 被強調的部分 + that + 其餘句子,能讓讀者的注意力聚焦在作者認為最關鍵的訊息上,比直接寫 Better preparation can keep such scenes from repeating itself 更有說服力與修辭張力,是學測作文中展現進階句型掌握度的常見技巧。學生在文章結論段想強調『某個做法才是解決問題的關鍵』時都可以套用,例如:It is only through hard work that success can be achieved。

範文由 WriteUp 依學測評分規準產生,供練習參考,不是大考中心公布的佳作。

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